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I’ve spent a lot of time talking about Spy x Family here on Popverse Jump, but there is a good reason for that – I really like it, and who doesn’t love to talk about the things they love? Watching Loid and Yor struggle with their competing commitments to work and family is something that most people can relate to, especially once they have kids running around providing near-infinite distractions. While we’ve seen Yor start to embrace her role as mother of the Forger household, I’m still waiting for Loid to become the father of Anya in more than just name.

Despite starting as an intentionally fake family set up to allow the parents to spy and assassinate as necessary, the Forgers have turned into one of the most wholesome family units in manga and anime with little Anya at the core. Her adorable antics and psychic tomfoolery are the glue that binds Spy x Family together, but we’ve constantly seen Loid struggle to let himself form more than a superficial bond with his adoptive daughter.

While Loid’s reasons for struggling to emotionally connect with Anya are different – he watched pretty much everyone he loved as a child die in war – it is a fear that I think most dads can relate to. Every expecting father I’ve known, myself included, has that moment of wondering if they will be able to love their child. Really, completely love them in the unconditional way that all kids deserve. Part of that fear comes from our disconnect from the child during pregnancy and part of it comes from the way society has conditioned us to stifle our emotions.

Boys and men aren’t encouraged to be loving and affectionate in the same way as women, which, when coupled with the trauma Loid was inflicted with, is difficult to overcome. He has convinced himself that getting close to others leads to pain. So, when Loid struggles to quiet his anger as someone upsets Anya, it catches him off-guard. He has to find excuses to do nice things for his family – he dresses up like a goofball not because he wants to make Anya smile but for the sake of the mission. He goes to extraordinary lengths to reward Anya for getting into Eden Academy to keep her engaged with the family rather than because he is proud of her.

So, I get why Loid is so resistant to the idea, but the big emotional payoff of Spy x Family needs to be him fully embracing his role as father to Anya. It feels like the only logical conclusion to his story arc, with him realizing that he can allow himself to not just endure fatherhood but to enjoy it. While I suspect that Tatsuya Endo will throw a couple of twists and surprises along the way, an ending that doesn’t include Loid finding the balance between his roles as a spy and father will feel incomplete to me.

I need to see the emotional barriers that Loid has put up between himself and Anya come down even more than I need to see the oft-hinted-at romance between him and Yor – and that is saying something. His story just won’t feel satisfying if he doesn’t have the startling realization that he does, in fact, love Anya beyond what the mission requires. That he would be devastated if Operation Strix were called off not because he would have failed his mission but because he would lose the chance to continue being a father.

The beginnings of this journey are there; we see him chide himself for thinking of Anya as his family rather than just part of his mission during the Cruise Adventure Arc. This is just the final evolution of that moment, where Loid finally allows himself to enjoy being a dad. Because, let me tell you, being a dad is fun; hard and stressful but wonderful and that isn’t something we see enough of in media.

Look, we know that Spy x Family can deliver darkness. It has handled the horrors of war in a way few anime have; now I’m just saying that, in the end, it needs to give us a little lightness as well. Show the joy of parenthood and how rewarding it can be to let those walls down and connect with someone in a meaningful way. We could all use a little more of that at the moment.

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