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Robert Eggers made Count Orlok a sex symbol in Nosferatu. Tremble at what he may achieve with Labyrinth's Jareth

Yes, Robert Eggers is making a Labyrinth movie, doubtless inspiring what will be a sort of Library of Alexandria for horny memes

Despite the pleas of our better angels, the monstrous and frankly grotesque Count Orlok from 2024's Nosferatu remake has got the internet all hornt up. If you ask me, it's because of the excellent filmmaking of Robert Eggers, and his power to turn something so horrifying (and dead) into an object of desire. It kind of makes you wish to know what Eggers could to with an actual sex symbol.

Did you hear that? It sounded exactly like the bending of one withered finger on a Monkey's Paw.

Yes, Robert Eggers has been given power over the sequel to Labyrinth, and with it, the codpieced capabilities of antagonistic Goblin King Jareth (What do you mean, 'It's a kid's movie with Muppets? There were Muppets?). As reported by Deadline, the film is being produced by TriStar and co-written by Eggers's The Northman collaborator Sjón.

This is an exciting opportunity for Eggers to contribute a new chapter of a beloved story (not to mention the promise of an absolute field day for meme culture), but you've probably already realized The Witch filmmakers first issue in crafting a sequel. That is, there's no David Bowie to play Jareth. It was Bowie, after all, that made the character the sexual awakening that he was - so how can we expect a different actor to take on the role? Alternatively, if there's no Jareth in the film, how could the movie's antagonist ever hope to measure up?

Don't think of that as me postulating on what we know about the Labyrinth sequel's plot - at the moment, that knowledge amounts to a big ol' nothing. We do know, however, that CEO of the Henson Company Lisa Henson will be one of the film's executive producers (I guess there were Muppets), so we can at least expect the Goblin Horde to return, even without their King.

Saying that out loud, I'm now wondering - might Eggers be thinking about introducing a Goblin Queen? What's Jennifer Connelly up to these days, and how does she feel about being both a meme culture beauty queen and quite possibly heavily made up in prosthetics?

Just saying, Demi Moore isn't hurting from The Substance.


In the immortal words of Danny Elfman, "Life's no fun without a good scare." We couldn't agree more, which is why we've cobbled together a couple pieces to send a chill up your spine. Join Popverse as we explore:

And much gore. Er, more. Much more.

 

Grant DeArmitt

Grant DeArmitt: Grant DeArmitt (he/him) likes horror, comics, and the unholy union of the two. As Popverse's Staff Writer, he criss-crosses the pop culture landscape bringing you the news and opinions about the big things (and the next big things). In the past, and despite their better judgment, he has written for Nightmare on Film Street and Newsarama. He lives in Brooklyn with his partner, Kingsley, and corgi, Legs.

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